Love....The pain it brings

We spend our whole lives looking for love...True love...We imagine how  good it would feel. We grow up reading books about love, and how wonderful it is. But we never think about how it feels to love someone that never loved you in return..we never are told what to do when someone breaks your heart. There has never been a story, to tell us the dark side of love. The pain that it can bring.


I once heard a woman say "We, as woman, tend to fall in love with the person we know someone can be instead of who they are." I fell in love with a man that lied to my face for 5 years of my life. He told me all the things I wanted to hear and I took them things and ran with them. Now in the end I'm left with a broken heart, that I was never told what to do with.....

Somehow I have the strength to look back and tell myself that things will be ok. I let myself mourn the death of us, what I knew "us" to be. I let myself mourn the lost of him. And someone told me it was ok to mourn him.So I did.

They say time heals all wounds. They never said how much time that would be.

I'm writing this because there have been times in my life that I have searched for something to feel the void. There were times I did things that I'm not proud of, because at that moment in life, I was feeling like that's what I needed. That void was never filled because while I was looking for it to be filled by someone else, no one ever once told me that that could only be filled by ME.  There was never  a voice of reason for that young, lost, empty, broken me. So I looked else where for something that I had to give myself.

I would hope that there is a girl out there reading this and I will be that voice of reason. That they will look in the mirror and realize that you can never really love someone until you love yourself. You have to be complete with in yourself before you try to be in a relationship and try to make someone happy. Please make your self complete please make yourself happy. You will learn that you will see life in such a different way.

I'm not happy with everything I did, I have kept everything on my blog because its good to reflect on your past, to see where you came from and be proud of where you are, and how far you have come.

SO I'm taking a moment to reflect and be grateful for where I am. I am a work in progress.....